Thursday 12 December 2013

Ghosts of Christmas past


This song reminds me of Christmas four or five years ago. It was used in the BBC's Christmas trailer package thingie, and I was about to meet A, yet another of my pick ups from an online dating site. He was different, though. Of all the men I've picked up in my time, he was without doubt the most insane. But I remember him fondly for a few reasons.

We instantly understood each other, which is a bit frightening when you consider neither of us were exactly a picture of mental health at the time. He was very handsome but so shady. It makes me laugh to think how shady he was, how he'd never answer a direct question, how he didn't really seem to want me to know anything about him, even though I did. I didn't want him to know much about me, but he did. He found out about my phobia of dentists and tormented me mercilessly with gory details of his root canal. I made him watch the news. He was never mad keen on reality.

The main thing about him is that he was honest. He was always honest. He didn't disappear on me because he made it clear from the start he might just not come back. I was fine with that. I've always been fine as long as I know where I stand. It would be interesting to see him again, and not necessarily in a romantic/sexual way. He did pop back into my life occasionally, but last I heard from him was about two years ago. He was back in Dundee, his hometown, and not doing too great. I hope he's okay now.

I know it's highly unlikely he'll ever read this, but on the slim chance he does, A - you're nuts. You know that. But I'm really glad I met you, because we had a connection I've never had before or since, and even though nothing came of it I can say I had that with someone.

And I still have your t-shirt.

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